Strategies for Responding to Microaggressions
You may be hesitant to have a difficult dialogue, but addressing such behavior is important. There are several strategic ways you can respond to a microaggression. Of course, which of these you use will depend on the offender, the environment, and the actual aggression that was made. Not all of these will be appropriate in every instance, but these can aid in addressing microaggressions.
Asking them to clarify
Request that they further explain their statement. This could prompt the offender to reconsider their view, statement, or action, or they might double down. Either way, you’ll have a better idea of your next steps.
Addressing the impact on oneself
You might try to explain how a comment or behavior has affected you personally. Helping someone become more self-aware can go a long way with some people, especially if their actions are unintentional.
Using empathy
Sometimes you can show understanding towards the offender while still being able to assert your feelings. Try putting yourself in their shoes and think about why they might have made a comment or behaved in a certain way. Understanding their perspective may lead to a more constructive conversation about biases and stereotypes.
Challenging the stereotype
You can challenge stereotypes by showing that you don’t fit into a preconceived notion. Offer examples from your own life or point out exceptions within the world. Discuss topics like environmental racism and the model minority myth, and how even unintentionally targeting a minority or marginalized group can be devastating and harmful.
Educating the offender
You might try to explain why a comment was offensive and why it might be taken personally. You can offer information about why a statement is destructive, sharing what you know about racial trauma and the effects it has on mental health. You could also share resources, like articles, videos, or books encouraging learning while avoiding arguments.
Separating intent from the outcome
Try to figure out if the offender was aware of their words or actions and how they might come across. Then, you can focus on addressing what happened instead of assigning blame. This is a non-confrontational way to manage a microaggressive situation.
Sharing your process
You can be vulnerable in front of the offender by explaining how their behavior, actions, and words make you feel. If applicable, share your personal experiences to try and create understanding.
Expressing your feelings
It’s OK to be honest about how microaggressive behavior affects you emotionally and personally. Sometimes this can help the offender see how destructive their actions can be. It might even foster empathy in them.
“Microaggressions are so subtle sometimes that it isn’t always clear if it has occurred. When it is apparent it isn’t always clear how to approach the person or if it should be addressed at all. Talking to others like one’s support system, therapist, and/or other trusted community leaders is a start in navigating the structure and nuisances of microaggressions.”
